It’s amazing how one can forget about one of the most biggest aspects of life, aside from living it. The aspect of your life, people you know and love, lives coming to an end one day. It sucks thinking about it. I guess that’s why most of us avoid it, but when you have no choice but to face it… or better yet stare right at it… your mind starts to wonder. Your left to realize a lot of things.
With each passing year we think about how much we’ve grown and how far we’ve come (and rightfully so). We think about what we hope to accomplish in the near future and the type of things that may be in store for us… but death usually doesn’t cross my mind. I don’t believe it’s because I like to stay positive, because death is neither a negative or positive thing… it just IS. But laying next to my grandmother in her hospital bed…I kinda wished I would have given it just a little more thought.
I don’t usually like to do the “should have, could have, would have” thing… but in this case maybe had I been a little more receptive/reflective of this very natural event.. I wouldn’t have so much on my mind right now. Like the times I’ve misbehaved and caused trouble… or acted out in any way. Maybe I would have been more prepared for these types of moments. I know we have tons of good memories and that they outweigh anything else, but it hurts knowing that her time is running out and soon we wont be able to make any more. soon, all I will have are our memories.
So much has been put into perspective for me, with all that’s going on; and some of which was just a good reminder of my core values already instilled in me. I feel like I might have been lost for a little bit, but now im back. Its back to the basics… with a vengeance.
I have returned to researching topics and will be communicating it with all of you (which is something I truly love!) For me: right now its all about Jayska.com and Family over everything!